Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Back again to Study


Many Sallams to all of you guys,many thanks to ut, maya, DTD, and Enlightened spirit for their concern and their comments. i was really busy last weeks in finishing my proposal of the PhD, so i'm going to study again ( wa wa wa wa wa wa) i know it will be at least very tough 3 years , i need ur duas to support me and do the best. i was lucky to get the offer from Cranfield university which is one of the best in my field,also i got very good supervisor for my degree who is from Iraq ,to be honest 60 % of the PhD decision belong to his support and motivation,may Allah reward him for his kindness and support. it took from me more than one month to take my decision which i think it's hard decision, cos spending 3 year just on study is adventure especially if u don't have scholarship from anywhere, inshaliha i hope i'll manage and i'll try to get the most of it.

Also i was involved in getting offers and acceptance for master and PhD degrees for the Libyan student who have scholarship from the government. walahi guys it's funny experience,it's amazing how people act, especially Libyans.i got many funny emails and phones u can't believe that can happen, read this email and told me what i should do


السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاتة
نحن الطالبتبن سين وصاد من كلية الطب البيطرى جامعة عمر المختار من طرف الاستاذ اكس نحتاج الى قبول اكاديمى فى تخصص التشريح بالنسبة لصاد وعلم الانسجة بالنسبة لسين فى احدى الجامعات البريطانية
ولكم جزيل الشكر
now what i should tell the universities give Ms s and MS y offer of master degree or what .
the other day i got call at 6 am,and directly the call went like this

هى: انت الى ادير فى القبول الاكاديمى
انا: لا مش انا

she call at 6am this mean 8 am in Libya, but she couldn't say good morning or sallam alikum or anything good. there are a lot of funny stories i think it needs one especial post.

this funny experience has brought my attention for many things i wasn't aware of, most of those students are girls i think at least 80 % from the students who contact me, and all of them are singles which make their life more difficult because American and British embassies refuse to give visas to their fathers or brothers ,this bad situation put those poor girls in front 3 difficult choices

1- forget about the scholarship and stay in Libya and lose a big chance to discover the world and gain high qualification from abroad.

2- travel alone which i believe most of families will resist because of our highly respected values. at least 2 students told me that if they can not take her father or brother with her to uk, they will not come alone because it's against the isalm values( which i don't believe).

3- married the first one knock the door just to keep the chance of studying abroad and keep her progress.

now what you think and what you will do if you in that situation,if u r father or brother what u will advice your sister or daughter, and if u r the girl what decision u will take

22 comments:

libyan. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
libyan. said...

I actually was in this situation, i was thinking of it? will i be able to go alone? there was no one to go with me. I prayed Istikhara, many times for long weeks, i prayed to Allah, that if my trip alone is good for me, may Allah help me and guide me, and if not, may He stop me and give me something else. The funny thing is that i got married and i went out with my husbend to another place, and now i am studying. So keep on praying to Allah to guide you. this is what i recommend in those situation.
The sad thing is that in some cases, there are men asking these girls for marriage only because they are able to go abroad. SO be carefull.

Good luck for your Phd. Rabby inshalla i3eenek.

enlightened spirit said...

Gerat the brave come out at last from his cave ...
it is always good to read ur posts ... and haaay don't grumble, it is always excitinig to go back to study, wish u the best in ur PhD.
the issue u start to argue about is very thorny, I might come back to comment about it later.

Anonymous said...

السلام عليكم...أولا أتمنى لك من كل قلبي التوفيق فى الدراسة ولكننى كنت أتمنى منك أن تقوم بالأهم من ذلك والأولوية هي للحاضر وليس للمستقبل والله الموفق ......بالنسبة لرأيك فى العادات التى تفرض قيودا على دراسة الفتاة فاننى اختلف معك فى ذلك فان هذه القيود العرفية هى نتاج الشرع والدين رغم ان العرف به كثير من الانحرافات الشرعية ولكنني أؤيد عدم خروج المرأة إلا بمحرم وذلك للحفاظ عليها وصونها وليس لعدم الثقة لسمح الله كما ان الثقافة ليس محصورة بالعيش خارج الوطن فكثير ممن عاش فى أوروبا لا يمكن ان نقول إنهم متمدنون بل ازدادو جهلا فوق جهلهم ونسو ان قيمة الإنسان هى فى احترامه لنفسه ولإنسانيته ولشعوره بالأخر وليس ببدلته وشهادته ومعرفته لجون واليكس وماريا ولليان وعلى نفس المنوال يوجد هنالك فى الوطن قوما لاتستطيع الا ان تنزع القبعة احتراما وتبجيلا لهم...والعكس بالعكس من الممكن ان يحدث وليس انتقاصا من قدر احد ولكنني ارفض التعميم والإقلال من قيمة الوطن ....وعذرا على الإطالة ...فطالبة علم التشريح والأنسجة التى تحدثت عن بساطتها فى اخذ الامور لمجرد أعطإها اسمها للحصول على القبول انما يعكس ذلك طيبة هذا الشعب وأؤكد لك انك ستجد كثير من شباب بريطانيا ان لم يكن معظمهم لا يعرفون شى فى هذا العالم سوى الرقص فى الملاهي وشرب الخمر ومرافقة النساء و من يعمل منهم فهم كالبهائم او اقل قدرا لا يهمهم سوى المادة....... وأتحداك ان تسال أول إلف شاب بريطاني تقابلهم عن عاصمة نيبال ( وعشة بعشاء كان واحد منهم يعرف) حتى ليش سمو ساعة بيغ بين بهذا الاسم ولا أنقولك هضوم أغبى من هكى (إقل اطلاع) صبى اول واحد وقوله وين ساحة الطرف الأغر شوفا يعرفها ولا لا تبعني وبعدها جرمني والعشا فى البطريق ولا الكوخ وعلى حسابك اه .... وتحياتى لك algetanni

Mr: Madi said...

good luck in ur study pro

ibeebarbie said...

Salam Brave Heart,
WOW! What a decision you've made! Congratulations and all the best to you. I have no doubt that you'll do well. May Allah bless you always.

Crowded Mind said...

I thought that I missed the place

I'll be much better not like S and Sad
Goodmorning Mr brave heart and welcome back !!!
wish you the best in your PhD brave because you're brave so you'll do it
about the offers I laughed alot because I was talking about it....I know if the girl said that I'm going abraod sure some body will engage her,Iknow 2 girls got married by this way ! the happy end went abraid

for me I believe that I can't be abroad alone just its oki if i have a relative there so i can depend on

put those funny stuff in new post

fe aman Allah

Brave Heart said...

Libyan
welcome to my humble space.
u r right istekhara is great tool to guide us.
do u think there are people can married just to go abroad,what is the point if they will come back after 2,3 years.

Enlightened spirit
Thanks for the wishes, i'm still waiting ur comments.

رضا
والله حتى نا مانعرفها غاصمة النيبال

Mr: Madi
thank u bro

Ibee
thanks dear, not just u go back to study :-P

Maya
"I know if the girl said that I'm going abraod sure some body will engage her"
ok now i'm studying abroad why nobody want to engaged with me :-P
or this just happen to the ladies.

enlightened spirit said...

In fact I was afraid from commenting about this subject in public, coz I felt as if my personal life will be discussed on board, and that make me feel inconvenient. But as there weren't too much people discussing this issue, so I said to myself: well there will not be much arguments and conflicts, which gave me the courage to talk about it.
Actually dear brother I am living in this situation and it is really as I mentioned a thorny situation.
To take decisions in two major aspect of ur life in a very short period of time, is too overloading.
the first aspect is to travel abroad to complete ur study, when u get ur study sponsored, I think it is a foolish choice to miss this chance up, no doubt, especially in my field, the experience which I can get from studying overseas, will never even out what I might get with the experience available in my area. So of course I decided to go, then comes a list of headache, where I should go which country, which university, and…so on.
After that the second aspect emerged to the surface, with whom I should go, the choice of going alone wasn't one of mine at all, not because of any religious issue, but despite of all my-self confidence and strength which proved from all my friends, I find it too difficult for me to stay for this long period alone, and as Maya said many guys show up, and as there wasn't many serious proposal before, so the whole experience is new, and the choice is more difficult, and that put me in a very stressful situations.
If I didn't have very supporting parents, I wouldn't knew, what stupid choices I might made.
So far I am going with my parents, don't know what is hidden in the future, but as long as there is an open door in front of me I will not turn back, I will always pray istekhara and will carry on in the path till the end.

Sorry for making u read this long comment but the subject is so close to my life, I felt as if it was written for me, don't let my ego down by saying: no it isn't ;)

Salaam brother

Brave Heart said...

Dear Enlightened Spirit
I believe u'll be successful inshaliha,i'm sure u will follow good girl steps. and believe me it's not just your problem, i have applications for more than ten in the same situation like yours. it's very difficult to go another country u did not anything about it not just for females also for males due to the bad social habits we have. again inshaliha allah will support u with your parents and you will be ok. btw which degree u wanna do postgraduate or click training

enlightened spirit said...

postgraduate study.

Crowded Mind said...

Salam Brave
Because you are a man you don't need to ask some one to be with you but for us we can't go alone so thats why most of the girls refused that and the others as i said got married and went there
so sorry bave as you said :

this just happen to the ladies.

fe aman Allah

Lebeeya said...

Mashallah! I am sure the decision wasn't easy but just think that in 3 years time you will be Doctor Braveheart :)

I am very happy for you and inshallah Rabi yiwafgik.

Did you find a job yet ?

dusk till dawn said...

salam Brave heart,
how nice to see u back.iam realy so pleased for u and ur phD iam sure u will just do fine, sorry to reply late, just busy wt work.
regarding the libyan student , well its all down to the family trust .if the family knows how trusted their daughters are, then its a chance for them to study and progress further, i know quite few libyan girls who study in uk, medicin and other study who live alone and doing great ,well respected .its a challenge for them. pluss they in contact wt their family all the times. plus they can always live in the uni hall of resedent.i do respect been an arab libyan muslim,
the bottom line is if u have full support of ur family and understanding,thats whats count.
so ur famouse guy now brave heart early fone calls ha ha whats next a nock on the door
take care and gd luck bro we are proud of u

Brave Heart said...

enlightened spirit
gooooood luck inshallah

Crowded Mind
yea Maya i understand that.i'm just kidding.

Lebeeya

98745982576567298374 welcome back. were u been?really u been missed.
Doctor Braveheart, it sounds funny.
allah yeslmik inshallah.


DTD
THANK U BRO. u r right it backes to familly trust and how they grow up their children on trust or no. i think it's process of devlopment in our libyan social habits.

Brave Heart said...

lebeeya
as u see i changed my plans from looking for job to just finish this study.

Anonymous said...

A Phd impressive stuff...bil toufeeq inshallah!
I've heard about girls getting proposals left right and centre soon as people find out that she has a bi3tha, which makes the men asking look desperate, not a nice look!!Harsh but true...
Surely if the UK was told about muslim girls needing a ma7rim when travelling they would understand...or is that just wishful thinking?Universities here looove international students as they pay 3 sometimes 4 times as much as a UK student....a word from the University to the right department may help??

libyan student said...

ok so im a libyan student and for me it was an easy choice take the scholorship and go sure there were some issues at first but alhamdo lilah i had an understanding family and as for the people who get married well i think thats just mad i mean your going to be in the uk for maybe 4 years so you ruin yourlife in the process anyway just my opinion .
advice to other libyan students its not very hard studying abroad just people always complicate stuff

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